Locked Love

The Only thing holding me back is the thought of you,
Holding on to the memories that once made me believe it was true,
Just a moment in time that I thought was forever
You sold the  dream of forever,
Living in a Bubble on the outside where lies and deceit began to build,
I loved you like a drug I swallowed all your words like a pill.
I’m trying to move on but the thought of you still lingers,
We played this back and forth game for so long,
I fell in love with you once again not realizing
Us and this relationship could never win.

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A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

trust/trəst/

Noun:	Firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.

Tired of the false accusations blamed, for every situation
looking back on it all I begin to , second guess my self
it really wasn't it me.
A plan to blame me, so you can leave
not really a good person just someone who once needed me now has found what they need else where
now I no longer matter but when you had no one I was always there.
I feel foolish to think you where honest and loyal,
no friend to me just someone who was bound to cross me eventually
your not to be trusted
only a soul who once, had my all now has drift into a box  titled  " Just Like The Rest Of Them"
your no different from my past, just someone who camouflage
 their self well enough to make me
 believe they weren't so bad.

I Didnt Know My Own Strength

Someone use to sing this to me, as I would cry in their arms because, I struggled with things in my life, and til this day those memories replay in my mind. I couldn't stand on my own, I didn't know how strong I was until god forced me to be. I look back at all the things I have gone through and can say I made it. but this song really makes me cry every time I listen to it because those memories replay in my mind over, crying to my eyes nearly fell off, listening to this made me feel like this was meant for me.

I Didn’t Know My Own Strength

And I Crashed Down, And I Tumbled
But I Did Not Crumble

I Got Through All The Pain

------

Once things die down, and everything begins to settle

The truth begins to arise…

You don’t really like me for me; Constant corrections certain smart comments of things you want me to be.

I don’t think you want me to be who I really and truthfully all I can be is me.

You would rather me, do things your way, which is saying I would lose someone of me.

Someone once told me don’t you ever change for a temporary person in your life, and I believe their right.

why pretend to be something I am not for someone who doesn’t love me for me, no correction, no hurtful comments just glad they met me.

It is hard enough maintaining sanity in this world wind of things I call life

But to remain myself seems to be the struggle

Letting someone make you feel like everything about you is wrong is where I draw the line their supposed to build you up, not bring you down

but this is all learning experiences in life

Time can't even heal

The pain from a year ago still prevails, still lingering in my thoughts flash backs run through my head. visions of feeling lied to replaying in my head. piercing certain parts of my heart, Reminding me that I once gave you all my trust. now im here, giving you it all back will result in heartbreak?The truth is I dont believe what you say, you once played me without a care but still said you loved me to keep me here based off of lies so I would stay. my love for you overflows which scares me the most, the past keeps coming back . the lies you told, the pain you cause keeps replaying back. How do I still love you when, for months you made me cry, pretending like I didnt know behind my back you were telling me lies.

...

-Things started off as fairytale you where my superwoman. The one I ran to when the world was against me. The only thing I felt was real, A dream within this collapsing reality. Our heart played the same song, connected within every beat feelings of love flowing through every verse. lost in each other arms it was our comfort, believing we can with stand all obstacles, as long as it was WE....


-Time passed and the love we once share slowly faded in front of our very eyes, the smiles turned into frowns, joy turned into pain and what once was no longer is . Our passions and dreams soon drifted our dream world collapsed. Forgetting the passion and commit, leaving behind laughter and memories, wishing we could wrap just one finger around it as soon as time hit us we drifted maybe this love wasn't for ever but only for a season.....

Sure Thing

VT

On the borderline between, for sure and still not knowing,

waiting for a sure thing but being blinded by not knowing if its in front of me.

not completely comfortable saying im yours,

you treat me like a friend, and when i least expect me, you wrap me with your love...

wanting to never sweat that, but something keeps pulling me back.

fearing the heart break that may come along with it

trying not question this love thing but still holding on to the what if's

making me feel like no other...

which why i want this sure thing, fighting with in my self,

because my heart tells me jump but my mind says don't.

giving me something ive never had, making everyone else ive dated, looked bad

its not that i don't have faith an you, or your not giving me enough.. its that,im afraid of this sure thing...

Far away....

Being, close to someone, that's now so far away, kills me,

the only person who understood me..

i cant explain how hard it is today for me to even concentrate,

while every one else around me, seem to see it as another day,

for me its probably of the worst days of my life

you were a big part of my life and without you i probably wouldn't be where i am today...

you;ve been my angel through it all... when i think about you, it makes me smile..

when i was younger you would tell me " never let anyone detour you from your dreams"

and since day one its stuck with me...

The one who, took care of me when everyone else... left me

I truly i cant believe its been so long since you been gone

i depended on you to be here..

I needed you to be here....

there's no else who has impacted my life as much as you and today is your birthday... AND i love you and MISS YOU.. RIP...

Bad taste in my mouth...

- the after taste of a broken heart is what you left me with..

- A tart yet sour and bitter everlasting.. Feeling that I won't forget

No alert no alarm, not even a warning..

-How was I suppose to know that, this love we shared was just for the moment,

-Something to occupy ya time, while you became, my time...

-You became my escape, and now you want to escape...

-Leaving me with questions & so many reasons why..

I didn't even have a chance to cry, more of numbing sensation that started from my heart. and ended between.. My thighs

- where you once caressed now , your someone Else's.. and you could care less

- I hate to say it but used me, as a temporary fix, for the time being..

- trying to, get the memory of your ex, out your head, so you settle m for me not truly caring about my emotions just using me for NOW...

You left a bad taste in my mouth one I can't get out...

As hard as, it is to say goodbye, everything tells me I should.

Tho her heart has me in its grasp tangled up in its love, seeing no one else

I wish I truly had her heart in my hands, maybe I did, I will never know ..

Sacrificing every last breath, and ever last.. Attempt to make it work..

Feeling as if I the walls are closing, only because I'm surrounded by all your good lovin.

Snatched within a matter of seconds, no longer settling for what was, living for what should be..

Loving her from a distance, but still holding on to her heart, without her even knowing,

Caressing her.. Emotions


Kissing away her fears..


But not for long letting go .. is hard and her heart is where i wanna be, but dnt need to be.. :(

Nothing Even Matters....

-If nothing really mattered, our love would stay the same. Their would be no difference in the way you act, Their wouldn't be no anger when you say my name.

No matter how far or close you are, nothing less but love I should feel, If you said it then you should mean it, you should prove your love was real.

-if nothing even matters then these fights should disappear, no more lonely nights, no more sorrow, no more sad songs and Tears.

- without any question of why, this fear inside shouldn't exist, its because you speak of these words. Of love but do they truly exist ?

-No more wondering who else your loving, no more fearing the unknown, if nothing really mattered, you would not only tell me it would show....


-uniquesoul

This isnt Goodbye....

This isn't goodbye....

more like a fair well to the old me. the one who gave everything
she had to be love by somebody. The one, who tried to reach her
dreams but couldn't because of the fear in me.

This isn't goodbye....
When you've been hurt so many times, and cried so many nights
that your vision on reality has be come foggy an you can no longer..
See the future...


This isn't goodbye...
Its more of a hello to, the new me. The girl who never settles for anything but the best,
who if isn't put first, doesn't give it the time of day..
who lives to make her self happy, no one else...

No Regrets....

I am letting go of who I once was, because of you.

Not because of your presence but because of the essence of you

This love thing has captured me in its grasp.

No longer a figment of my imagination, something real I can touch and I can feel.

This love has buried its self deep with my soul, its planted within me, and continues to grow.

No expectations when it comes to this, it feel like heaven, this love I won’t forget.

Letting go of the fear, has became a thing of the past, living within your loves grasp.